Double your Cheer to Help Flux Dash to the Endzone

(Photo graphics by Will Lowry. Post by Kelly O’Donnell.)

Are you ready for some football? Because it’s game time, and here come the Fluxy Dinos! And your donations are already helping us get to the end zone! Every $2,000 raised brings us TEN YARDS closer to the goal of $20,000 by opening night of JANE THE PLAIN.

To make this game more exciting, an anonymous donor has agreed to match every dollar raised — up to $5,000 — through December 31st! That means, if you were to give $1,000, your donation will be matched, giving Flux $2,000 and a ten-yard gain for a first down!

Let’s take a look at the highlights of the game so far with television commentator Kelly O’Donnell:

The Kick Off
“On a chilly autumn night, it’s the perfect weather for football and, coincidentally, the Flux Family Feud Benefit! The ball is kicked off and caught by Feud Host Matt Archambault in the opposing team’s end zone. The Feud Contestants are providing solid blocking as the ball is run to the 20 yard line for a $4,000 gain! What a tremendous start! The Dino cheerleading squad are going crazy as Byers does a triple backflip, Hip-Flores does a cool ninja move, and Lowry gets the crowd pumped!

Next play!
The Dinos are at the line of scrimmage and the Flux Annual appeal letters have been mailed! Coach Schulenburg has a lot to prove with this team he ensembled–I mean assembled. The snap! Quarterback Crespo opens to the left, she fakes, she throws a quick pass to running back Uche. Wow this kid can run! He dodges, he sprints for a gain of 15 yards! The Dinos are at the 35 yard line for a financial gain of $3,000! They are $13,000 from the end zone!!!

The Dinos call a time out. Let’s go on the field with reporter Alisha Spielmann from the Plainview Post. Alisha, any news down there?”

Spielmann: Hi Kelly!!! 🙂 🙂 I’m here with Offensive Coordinator, Heather Cohn. Heather, this is a huge game. What is your strategy to get to the end zone?

Cohn: I told the team that we need to get those appeal letters written on time, hit hard by swiftly sending the thank you letters, and just keep reminding the fans that we appreciate their support. In other words, play smart football.

Spielmann: Back to you Kelly!!! 🙂

1st & 10
“Thanks Alisha! We are back. The snap! Crespo looks long. The generous donations from the annual appeal continue to come in! She’s got room. Whoa! She throws it to Tanenbaum! I thought this kid was just the team photographer! He runs safely out of bounds for a gain of 10 yards, a first down, and $2,058! The Flux mascot, who happens to be the same height as Creative Partner Kia Rogers, is lighting up the crowd! The Dinos are at the 45 yard line with $9,058!!!

1st & 10
The Dinos still with 55 yards to go. The snap! The latest Flux eblast has been mailed just in the nick of time. Crespo fades back. What amazing blocking by the Friends of Flux! She passes to Friend of Flux, Adam Szymkowicz, who is wide open. He makes the catch at the 45 yard line for a $2,000 gain and – whoa! – he is tackled hard!

There is a flag on the play! Let’s see what referee Sandra Morgan has to say:”

Morgan: Ten yard penalty. Defense. There is an anonymous matching donor to give the Dinos an extra 10 yards. First down.

A 20-yard gain for $4,000! The Dinos are at the 35 yard line with $13,058!

35 yards to go
The snap! Crespo hands off to Stage Manager Jodi Witherell who charges through the defense for 2 yards. It looks like she will be tackled–wait a minute!!–a grant just came in from The Dramatist Guild Fund for $750 and she is pushed forward for a 5-yard gain!

Another flag! It looks like offensive linewoman Aja Houston was pulled down by the face mask. Coach Schulenburg does the smart thing and holds back Adam Swiderski and Rocio Mendez from running on the field to drop-kick the opposition.

Morgan: Penalty. Defense. Another anonymous matching gift. 5-yard penalty. First down.

“Whoa! The Dinos are at the 25 yard line with $15,000!!! $5,000 more until the end zone!!

25 yards to go
The snap! Crespo fakes a hand-off to Uche and she runs left, passing it to wide receiver and All Star FoF Jason Paradine!! Paradise!!! He is dodging, jumping, and weaving through the defense like a cakewalk to the 23 yard line, the 20, the 16! He gives a little wave to the stands to fiance, Cotton Wright. He may go all the way! and—OH MY GOD!— he is hit hard by Scrintle and he drops the ball! FUMBLE! The Anonymous Matching Donor accidentally kicks the ball and it bounces toward the end zone and stops at the 6 yard line! There is a pile-up involving Johnna Adams, Sean Williams, Janie Bullard, Mike Mihm, and Luis Cobo!!

The refs, Sandra Morgan, Marilou Cassidy, and Candy Schulenburg run in and start throwing bodies off the massive heap. Who has it? It’s Lori Parquet of the DINOS! Still Dino possession and first down on the 5-yard line! Parquet is doing her usual walking-to-China celebratory dance and tight end Chris Wight joins in! The crowd loves it!


“This game is unbelievable! The Dinos are at the 5 yard line with $19,029!!! Just $971 until a touchdown! The matching donor has donated the entire $5,000 and momentum is clearly in favor of the Flux Dinos!

What a game so far! $5,000 more is needed for a touchdown! Thank you for all of your support. Please consider making your tax-deductible donation before January 1 to help us get to the end zone! Happy Holidays and Happy New Year from everyone at Flux!

Gooooo Flux!

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